Answer to a friend

I have a friend who had asked/complained to me about how it was okay, even good, for a guy to have sex and yet for women its a bad thing. I had tried to explain the difference as well as the fact that I am not one to approve of male “sluts” any more than the female kind. But I was never able to articulate a very good answer.

Well the much more eloquent Ferdinand Bardamu came to my rescue in his article up at the Spearhead. He writes:

The sexual double standard arises from the reality that getting sex is easy for women but hard for men. The reason studs are respected and sluts are derided is because being a stud requires skill, talent, and practice, while being a slut merely requires a pulse and a lack of impulse control. The unsung flip side of the double standard, however, is that female virgins are cherished whereas male virgins are ridiculed. A man who can’t get laid signals to the world that he is a loser, while a woman who resists spreading her legs for every scumbag who winks at her shows herself to be a sober, selective person. Because a female’s primary goal is getting the highest-quality man available to commit to her, women who cannot or will not stay in a relationship are poor sources of information on men. The male virgin and the female slut are mirror images of each other in terms of attractiveness to and knowledge of the opposite sex.

This is the best summary I have ever seen on the issue and was quite happy to hear that above-mentioned friend found the article quite enlightening.


3 Responses to “Answer to a friend”

  1. 1 SuperPickle
    January 18, 2010 at 4:25 AM

    I love you for this answer.

  2. January 21, 2010 at 1:34 PM

    WoW. That is a much better answer than I was going to come up with. I was getting mired in attacking the premise that men with poor impulse control are universally respected. It has been my observation that the opposite is true. Providing of course that the man is not getting any because he chooses so and not because he has no choice.

  3. 3 emarel
    February 15, 2010 at 10:18 AM

    This is an OK answer, but the deeper reason that drives the double standard is explained in any of Daniel Amneus’s works: “The Garbage Generation”, “The Case for Father Custody”, and “The War on Patriarchy”. Men need to be certain that the children they raise are their own. Without that certainty, men will become dis-invested in their society, and that society will devolve to the level of the ghetto, Indian reservation, or stone age society. The feminist’s greatst cause is the liberation of female sexuality from society’s restraints, which results in the above.

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